A Psychic’s Limitations & Your Light

Don't be discouraged quote

” I don’t try much to tap into world events; that’s not something I particularly want to be shown, because what am I going to do about it, you know?”

This was a conversation I had about a week ago with one of my Tarot people. She reminded me there are situations when it could indeed matter–smack! her point hit home–but she seemed convinced in that case, I’d be given the info I needed whether I went looking for it or not.

I wondered if she was right…

I couldn’t help but think of this conversation yesterday afternoon, when I first realized what had happened–the world was mourning the tragedy in Connecticut.

I spent most of the day oblivious: working on that post about Zodiac readings, requesting feedback and setting up a Holiday Specials page. I was thinking about what I needed to change on the site, working up a newsletter, what other gifts or goodies I might offer to my people, and how to improve my business. Mundane matters. I hadn’t spent any time surfing the news or checking Facebook or otherwise interacting with the world.

I had no idea anything might even be amiss, beyond a few moments of idly wondering if or how that Tower I drew for yesterday’s Everyday Tarot column might manifest itself. I hoped it wasn’t connected to my crying jag of the night before. The Tower always makes me nervous.

Some psychic I am.

I’ve had a post half-written, rattling around in my head a while now about how the psychics and Tarot readers and mystics at large just don’t know EVERYTHING. Sometimes, what we’re given via divine grace is SO amazing, so clearly supernatural, that our people expect us to have every single answer. They expect perfection, garnished up at the ready on a silver platter. Failure to serve it up can only mean we’re somehow “holding out.” Lapses of omnipotence must mean we’re not really trying, you know?

No, no, no. I can’t do that. Illustrated in living color, I can’t do that.

This isn’t the post I was planning to write.

I don’t hold myself up as glow-in-the-dark-holy-special. I don’t talk about my great-great-great grandmother handing down the gift of seeing through the veil, near-death experiences altering my DNA or popping out of the womb to be some kind of aura-reading, ghost-befriending infant spiritual prodigy. Like many, I’d explained away most of my own mystical experiences as “coincidence” or “imagination” for most of my life. But they were still there.

That doesn’t make me better or worse than anybody else. I don’t want to stand high above those I serve, teetering upon a shaky pedestal. The ego may dig the attention for a minute–it calms self-doubts I carry in my heart–but the higher the pedestal, the harder the fall. And if you’re honest with yourself, the fall is inevitable.

Instead, I look to walk BESIDE those I work with. I’m a seeker, just like you. Yes, I have innate skills and yes, I’ve worked hard to develop them to the point I can justify charging for their application. But we all have some degree or another of the same gifts. We access those gifts through raising our vibration. I encourage everyone to connect to their own inner divinity. We each have our path, and our job here on earth is to find and follow it as best we can.

Times like this,  the truth becomes even more poignant. NO ONE has all the answers. Nobody has the market cornered on light. But each of us holds a light of our own. Expressing love is the most straightforward way to access the light.

Whatever light you’ve got, please do light your candle by it and step forward. Hug your family and call your friends and do your damnedest to shine that light everywhere you go. As small as it may be, as inadequate as it may seem in the face of great pain, every little bit of it counts. Everyone who speaks and acts in love IS a natural healer. We need you.

Much love.

Tarot Readers Judging Clients

Altarpiece of the Last Judgement, detail; 1443-46; Hotel Dieu at Beaune

“Please don’t judge me.”

The words were just typed into a chat box, but I felt a hesitation, the cringe of negative expectation, just as clearly as if she’d been sitting next to me, looking me in the eye.

“I won’t judge you. I promise.”

I typed the words back, because I wanted them to have that written-word-weight, but also looked up into the camera so she could see my sincerity. She needed to see my sincerity.

“He’s married,” she confessed.

“I don’t judge you,” I reiterated. I meant it, just as much as the first time I said it.

I was doing a video/chat Tarot reading, and set about answering her questions as best I could, leaving aside the morality concerns. She didn’t need my help with the morality issues, no doubt already having had many sleepless nights to struggle with that herself. She was looking for perspective and information on where circumstances currently sat, and I did my best to give exactly that to her.

This isn’t to say I’m a fan of extra-marital affairs. I certainly don’t want any in my personal life! It just means that I am not the keeper of anyone else’s path. I don’t know why a person is where they are. I don’t know where their own path is leading and what is “bad” to me may well be a part of their own journey. I don’t know about the marriage or about the affair or about the people involved or what brought them to where they are right now. Just because I’m a reader doesn’t mean I’m omnipotent. I don’t ever forget that fact.

But more importantly, I’m not here to determine right and wrong for anyone else. I don’t want the karma!

Yes, there are circumstances I don’t think I could put aside well enough to effectively consult. Murder or exploitation of children come to mind as a couple of examples. I could never be objective. There are also some acts for which I will not be a participant because I don’t feel right or good about doing so–every time I’ve ever tried to fudge even a little on what I feel good about, it’s cost me. So if you’re looking to “psychic spy” on your ex, I am not the Tarot Diva for you!

But just because you make different decisions than I would in general doesn’t give me the right to look down upon you. There is always a balance to be struck, between encouraging others to reach for what I perceive to be higher, more positive expressions of energy, versus being convinced I as just a humble Tarot chick have the right to make those calls for everyone else on the planet.

So yeah. If I don’t feel good about what I’m trying to do with our work together, I won’t do it. But you’re free to live your own life regardless, without me sending disapproving vibes or spouting moral imperatives and declarations of ultimate righteousness at you. To me, the point is living righteously, not preaching it. I believe living righteously is the most meaningful way of preaching it anyway.

What’s your take on readers judging clients?

(P.S. If you’d like to try a live video reading, we can Skype or use another video chat online for the same cost as a phone reading. You don’t need a camera. Just let me know when you get a consult.)

When Readings Go Awry…

“I’m sorry, but I have no idea what you’re talking about.”  Oh my God! It’s the moment every reader dreads.

It’s also the moment every single reader will face, if you do this work long enough. I don’t care who you are. Nobody’s above it. No-bod-y. It can come any time, but I suspect it’s a touch more likely if your head begins outgrowing your hat, you know what I mean?

For me, a hot flash runs down my body and my stomach starts to gets tangled–somewhere around the third chakra, now that I think about it. It’s an awful, awful feeling.

It’s also incredibly humbling, oh-so-human, and without a doubt, part of the gig.

Who knows why? There will always be some people you simply cannot read, for whatever the reason. And even for those that you can connect to, there will be some circumstances where it simply doesn’t work. Maybe it’s the reader, maybe it’s the questioner, maybe it’s the chemistry, maybe it’s not the right time for a reading or maybe it’s something else entirely and who the Hell knows?

I don’t think many realize the absolute leap of faith it takes, to start flipping over cards and running your mouth. Because even when you KNOW it, it’s not YOU who knows it. Readers are not the source of information, they are a channel. For me, getting access to “the good stuff” comes via grace without exception.

When that grace doesn’t arrive, I recommend accepting it gracefully. Sometimes you can regroup and pull a reading out but other times, it just ain’t gonna happen and one had best accept that reality.

To put in in perspective, I believe we get WHAT we are supposed to get WHEN we supposed to get it. If someone needs insight, I am not so arrogant to assume I’m the only potential channel! And if I’m not able to provide insight, I assume there is a reason. I look for a lesson for myself if I can find one, but don’t freak if I don’t see it. Maybe I’ll be given understanding  or maybe I won’t, but it really doesn’t matter.

Because all those readings I do? They are not about me.

But even so, I really, really, really appreciate clients who are kind about it. Thank GOD it doesn’t happen often.

Do you have any readings gone awry stories?

A personal Fool’s Journey: Living the Archtypes

Glasses at top of photo to show size.

I’m always looking to learn something new about the cards, and a book I picked up a few months back has been a goldmine in that regard: [amazon_link id=”0980409934″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Tarosophy[/amazon_link] by Marcus Katz. One of the exercises I’m particularly excited about trying: “Living the Archtypes” (pg 49).

Using Major Arcana only, you take out one card at a time, put it in a prominent place, and just wait. Periodically reflect and meditate on the card, but leave it out and in your line of sight until the card speaks to you, something in your everyday life personifying that card’s energy. If you have to ask, “Is this it?” it isn’t! Doing this for the entire major arcana, Katz says you can expect it to take anywhere from 6 to 18 months to complete the cycle.

He suggests skipping the Fool, as the exercise itself serves that energy, but my Virgo doesn’t like to leave the Fool out. He also notes the method of communication will suit the card’s energy. E.g. the High Priestess won’t be as direct as, say the Emperor. The idea here is getting to know the Tarot better by life experience.

I just got Cathy McClelland’s gorgeous Star Tarot, a majors-only deck for this exercise. The cards are delightfully huge at 4 1/2″ by 6 1/2″, so great for this kind of use. I plan to frame the cards as I complete each in the exercise.

I’m excited!

Has anyone else done this type of exercise? Anybody want to join me?

Note on those interested in the book: it covers ground from basic to advanced Tarot, including a huge amount of material I’ve never seen  anywhere else and that’s saying something. I consider this a serious, study book. I bookmark pages and write notes in the margins! The writing at times drifts towards an overly academic tone and can be awkward, but only in spots. I would order it from an Amazon reseller over the publisher if possible–I had a rather unpleasant exchange with the publishing house in my impatience over the full month it took to receive the book. But even if you have to go that route, I’d still say the material here is well worth the trouble…

[amazon_link id=”0980409934″ target=”_blank” container=”” container_class=”” ]Tarosophy. Tarot to Engage Life, Not Escape It (Modern Magistery series)[/amazon_link]

Helping Your Reader: Breathe

Readings = energetic fraternization. It’s you, your reader, and the universal ether-net all mixing it up. Auric dance party! So…it’s not just about the reader. The energy YOU bring to the table is pivotal for quality of reading you will get.

Now, I know many times, people come for readings when they are worried, upset, confused or just bothered. Strong emotion is often part of it, and I totally get this. I’m fine with it. But realize that once you’ve secured yourself a reading, it’s time to step back a bit.

The number one, most important, most helpful thing you can do to help your reader is to BREATHE! Clear your head. GROUND.  Relax. Release. Step back. Stop freaking out. Take care of yourself, be kind to your body and your mind. Let go. Trust that all will be as it needs to be, and you’ll find the guidance you need to make the best decisions possible.

Yes, this really does help!

See, if it’s WWIII in your head, if sirens are blaring, if it’s an emotional disaster zone in there, it’s a LOT harder to hear anything above that din. It’s difficult to sort out what images are present in the situation versus what is generated in a fearful  imagination on overdrive. Like psychic static. (Not to mention, there’s an emotional “contact buzz” factor. I generally plug in to the questioner’s emotional state surrounding the question. So be kind to your reader by being kind to yourself.)

Breathe. It clears your mind and calms your heart.

Breathe. It grounds, bringing you to the present, out of past regrets or future fears.


Do you find this true of readings, too?

Scratchy Readings…I do ’em!

Scratchy ReadingsI’ve had to give a few very scratchy readings recently. These are rather hard to give but I’ve no doubt, much harder to receive. I do feel bad doing them, even when I’m handing over stark declarations. Never think for a moment it’s done cavalierly.

Honestly, I think my only saving grace here is working from love and  utterly without judgment. Otherwise, it would be intolerable to receive some of these readings. Especially if it’s square on target…

I have learned not to censor, although I won’t say I am never tempted to put on a sweeter spin, pull back, especially if I’m not sure. But I try to overcome that temptation, because I know it doesn’t serve. Every single time I’ve given in without exception, I’ve regretted doing so. I believe I get what I get for a reason. I believe the people who are drawn to work with me are so drawn for a reason. That’s the deal. I mean, how can you do this kind of work and NOT have faith around you’re doing, you know?

I can say people often seem most grateful for the scratchy readings. Not always, but often. Probably because it’s information sorely needed. And there’s been more than once, from followup I’ve learned that a very scratchy reading made a very positive difference in someone’s life. I’m grateful and relieved to know that! It balances out the sting, justifies it. But that doesn’t make it feel good at the time. However, I’m far more interested in helping you find your power than helping you feel good in that moment.

I know I’m skilled in addressing difficult circumstances. The years I spent working in crisis management, psych, addictions counseling and the like? It was training, for what I’m doing now! My directness is an integral part of who I am, so it only stands to reason it would be part of the right work for me. Anything short would be disingenuous. I’m not big on disingenuous, in case that’s not evident.

But that doesn’t mean I don’t feel for you. Far from it! So when I send you that reading that comes across like a knife in the gut, I’m very sorry for the pain. I consider it surgery, not gratuitous emotional violence. But I do understand, it still hurts the same. So please forgive me for my bluntness, understand the intent, and use whatever it is to your best advantage, okay? Use it it heal.

You ever get (or give) scratchy readings? How do you deal with it?