Two of Wands: You Can’t Please Everyone, So…

What do you do, when you can’t make someone happy?

Maybe you’re connected to someone in a way that’s not going to change. You want the relationship to work and be pleasant.

But despite your best efforts, that’s not happening. 

We often think if we can find the right (read: “magic”) words, the right approach or compromise or explanation, that would fix everthing. But it doesn’t.

This question has been on my radar recently and the answer is simpler than it would seem at first glance.

Nobody can truly understand what’s going on in the head of someone else. Nor do we need to. Your job is always YOU. 

If it doesn’t feel good, detach from it. Step back. Don’t make it your job to fix the other person or the situation. Just love ’em and give ’em some space.

It reminds me of the old song, Garden Party. “You can’t please everyone, so you have to please yourself.”

Priority one is being happy yourself. Let the rest of the bastards fend for themselves here.  Which takes us to next week’s forecast.

Next Week in Tarot

Outlook is the Two of Wands, with advice as the Ten of Cups (from the Legacy of the Divine Tarot deck).

Got a quick video forecast for you if you want to hear me say it. 😉

There will be choices this week. At times, your needs and desires may feel pitted against the rest of the world. But let your heart guide you.

Comfort and what feels most “at home” for you is the best guide. These decisions are best made outside the scope of pleasing anyone else.

This is actually better advice (for all the time) than you may think at first. If you stick true to your core and lovingly let other people determine their own feelings and experience, life gets a whole lot easier very quickly.

Try it with any challenging relationship. You don’t decide what someone else does or doesn’t do. Instead, you’re deciding what role (if any) you feel at home playing a part in. That’s it. Suddenly, life simplified.

Hope this is helpful and go out there and have an awesome week, folks! ♥


I will be doing some 2020 Holiday Year Ahead Readings as I sometimes do. The details of the special will be announced in a few days, so if you’re interested in what next year will bring for you, keep a lookout. As always, if you’d like a personal or issue-focused consult, you know where to find me!

Ten of Cups Reversed: Empty Spaces

My landlady has a well-earned reputation for planticide. She’s killed my flowers more than once. I never react very well to this, incidentally.

I also don’t think about it too much anymore, because what’s the point?

But I was remembering it last night, looking over the rooftop to the massive trees that poke up from the back. Because a couple of summers ago, she chopped down one of the biggest trees back there.

I was heartbroken. I loved that tree! (Okay, I love most trees. All the ones I’ve met.) But this particular tree was magnificent. I liked to watch this tree from my front porch, peeking out over the roof with the branches gently swaying. At the right time of the day, the leaves reflected the light as the branches danced, as if each leaf was coated with a little magic.

For a long time after that tree was cut down, I saw nothing more prominent than that gaping hole where one of my favorite trees had lived. But after a while, you stop paying so much attention to what’s missing, you know?

And that’s a good thing.

I eventually walked past the stump one day to spy some new growth. Yes! The tree had defied the death sentence! She wasn’t going anywhere. Her comeback may have been modest, but her roots go deep. I liked knowing that.

I just realized last night, I don’t see a hole there anymore. None at all. I couldn’t tell you exactly where that lovely tree had stood without going out back to seek out the stump.

The other trees had filled in the empty space with their own branches. That gap, the empty space, had been replaced with new life. And that’s what happens.

This coming week feels like this, to me. We can look for the holes in our experience, what’s missing. Or we can notice the other blessings that step up and fill in those spaces. There are always both.

Next Week in Tarot

This week, we have the Ten of Cups reversed from the Tarot Illuminati, along with Hibiscus (again) from Botanical Inspirations: Beauty & Happiness.

Every moment is full of possibility. You can see what you want, or see what you don’t want. Both elements are present in everything.

Sometimes, we think we have to rearrange the world a little bit–or a lot, or rearrange the other people in our world a little bit, or a lot–to achieve contentment. That’s a losing proposition if ever I heard one. Because really, how’s that working out for ya?

Don’t shoot for making anybody else happy here, either. Instead, look to boost your own happiness by seeking out the beauty around you. Beauty and happiness do go hand-in-hand. The mistake that most people make is thinking there isn’t always some beauty to find. There is, in everything. You just have to look at it in the right light to find it.

[bctt tweet=”Beauty isn’t an external reality. It’s a function of perspective. #OnMyRadar” username=”goddess_dix”]

Satisfaction is attainable, and it’s not very far away. Instead of seeking to please others, seek to please yourself by looking for what you love and reveling in the beauty of it.

Are you finding some beauty?

For a little help realigning your perspective in a private session, give me a holler.

10 of Cups: Quest for Harmony

A happy person lives a better life. Being in harmony makes for a happier person.

He who lives in harmony with himself lives in harmony with the universe.

 

The Ten of Cups (10 of Water in the Good Tarot) teams up with Hydrangea–Thankfulness for Understanding–from the Botanical Inspirations deck. This is some serious, feel-good energy if we follow the cards’ advice.

Happy Buddha is happy! He lets life flow around him and doesn’t look like he has much to complain about, huh? And I love Hydrangeas! Usually, I also love the quotes on this deck. But this quote, saying we must understand one another to forgive? Eh. It’s not my favorite.

I don’t believe we have to understand anything. Maybe believing you understand another’s motivations makes it easier to move on. But to me, the entire concept feels off. We barely understand ourselves, let alone anyone else! So much goes on inside of a person that another could never even begin to know. So a goal of “understanding” always strikes me as illusory at best.

But there’s a bigger reason.

For me to be in a position to forgive, it means I’m holding on to something yucky. It’s still an active vibration in my world. Stockpiles of complaints and unsettled scores don’t do anything but block personal flow.

If I’m holding a bag stuffed full of anger, blame, resentment, or what have you? That is an issue for ME. It impacts my life. Not so much an issue for whomever I have tagged the perpetrator. It’s weight I carry on my own back and nothing else useful comes of it. So why carry it?

I’m not suggesting it’s a great idea to attach yourself to unkind people. Just the opposite! Anger or blame is an attachment that’s every bit as powerful as any other flavor of connection. I’m suggesting evicting the entire mess from your head, your energy field, and your life.

And the only way I know how to evict is letting it go. Not giving it thought to “understand,” not trying to shame or convince, not collecting sympathy from supporters. Just letting it the Hell go, period. None of us will ever be able to get the rest of the world to behave according to our standards. So it’s a good idea to stop trying.

Reach for your own harmony first and as you find that, the rest begins to click into place.

[bctt tweet=”Inner harmony eliminates the need for the rest of the world to cooperate. #OnMyRadar” username=”goddess_dix”]

Video here.

This week, seek harmony and start your search in the mirror.

Looking for your own harmony? Give me a holler for a one-on-one if you would like some support in the process.

 

Bucking the System? Tarot Forecast, 3/27 – 4/2/17

I was getting a quick, fun reading at a fair one day–some sort of oracle stones. The reader asked me if I was a risk taker. I’m hesitating, thinking very earnestly on the question.

“I don’t know. I don’t feel like I’m that much of risk-taker.”

“How many different colors do you have in your hair?” she asked.

We laughed, and I got her point. What is no big deal to me–hair grows out, yo–may FEEL risky to others. In this case, the “risk” was mostly disapproval from people who don’t like grown women dying their hair weird colors. But it’s a legitimate “thing.” And I know it’s perceived as risky because I cannot count the number of people who have told me they’d love to do the same if they could find the courage.

Weird hair color and blue, glittery nails on someone much too old for such silliness by conventional standards is a tiny, even trivial example “bucking the system.” But it IS bucking the system. It’s about what I value on a personal level–color and glitz that makes me happy–versus what is considered conventional or socially acceptable.

This coming week is kind of like that.

Welcome to my Tarot forecast where I do things differently every week. Ha!

The Week Ahead

The Ten of Cups and Lovers combined speak to surrounding yourself with people that harmonize with you. Not yes-men and yes-woman. Yawn! But people whom you respect and respect you. There is space for synergy by teaming up with those you feel comfortable with emotionally. Harmony will be amplified, especially early on this week. It’s a way to ground yourself in stability before dealing with anything else.

Matter of fact, being grounded may come in handy mid to late week. The Seven of Wands teamed with the Tower and suggests calling out a naked emperor! Individuals may speak up to power or established systems. There is a feeling of fighting City Hall here, where the little guy stands up to the powers that be. This seems more personal to me, not necessarily a mass protest, but individuals speaking up in smaller ways.

In other words, don’t buck the system for the sake of bucking the system. Stay firmly grounded in what’s important to YOU in your own life. This is not worrying about others nearly so much as it feels like taking care of your own business.

But the other side of this process? Justice shows up to promise fairness–not to be confused with equality. In other words, the outcomes won’t be the same for everyone, but they will be applied equally and that’s motion forward.

Obviously, this is a forecast for the collective so that energy will play out differently for different people and for some, it will be less personal than for others. But don’t be surprised to see examples of it around you as you make your way through the week.

Tarot Advice

For advice, the Four of Cups teamed with the Seven of Cups suggests daydreaming about outcomes, playing what-if. There’s nothing wrong with that game. It can be incredibly beneficial, a lot of the time, if it’s used to understand and mold your ideas and help you remain optimistic. But understand the what-if’s you’re coming up with is incomplete, as they represent a transitory phase of the situation. Outcomes will have elements of your what-if’s but it won’t be a perfect match because the information is not yet fleshed out. Your dreams are baking this week, so it’s all still in the oven. Let it bake, you know? Let it bake.

We wind up with Death–there has to be a dying off and cleansing before your dreams can move forward. There is a energetic cleaning (which can include physical cleaning, especially symbolic physical cleaning). The new we’re moving towards, of course, is the final card here, the Six of Wands. Wow, that is a resurrection, huh?

My sense overall is that this is a good thing, a helpful breakthrough of sorts. So treat it as such. If you get yourself firmly grounded and feel the support and love of likeminded individuals, clearing out what is just not right isn’t so hard and in the end, it helps you keep moving.

Hope that’s helpful to you  and that you have a great week! Take care of yourselves and be well.

You ever find yourself fighting the big guys?

This week’s forecast features the Transparent Tarot. If you dig it, you may like my book, Everyday Tarot Archives, or a personal consult.

Emotional Grace Period, Recommended. Weekly Tarot, March 20 – 26, 2017

I am an emotional creature. I value strong emotion as an important part of who I am, though it sometimes presents it’s own complications. To compensate, I’ve had to develop some skill in managing emotional response without overwhelming anyone too near the strike zone.

Thank you, Saturn.

Naturally, I’m not always perfect at this endeavor. You can just ask the landlady, after my butterfly bush meltdown.

But more often than not, I am successful. I step back. I ground. I meditate, at least when I get to the point that I can. I journal. I go outside. I clean. I take a nap. I distract myself in whatever way seems to help. In short, I do everything I know how to do to talk myself off that ledge.

I mean, dumping an inferno of emotion purges, that’s for sure. But while it relieves the pressure, that out-of-control feeling just sucks and there’s always a hangover after the fact. It’s just not who I want to be, you know? That’s not how I want to feel. So I do my damnedest to take a different route.

Next week, I’m expecting how we handle intense emotion to have relevance.

Full forecast video.

We’ve got a slew of repeats from recent weeks and inversions galore. It has the feel of sludging through mud, man. And notice the dominance of the cups in the week’s cards. Emotions remain “a thing” with a friendly, yellow-alert level Tarot-reader advisory to reign in knee-jerk responses (lest you have something to regret later). We’re wanting to sidestep the collateral damage factor. It can be done, but will require restraint to pull off. [bctt tweet=”Enforce a grace period before acting on strong emotions this week. #OnMyRadar” via=”no”]

Weekly Tarot Forecast in Bullet Points

  • Monday, Eight of Swords rx. You’ll have the chance to free yourself from the knots you’ve been tied up in, right here. Open window of opportunity, and you’ll likely get a nudge to go. Don’t hesitate, it moves fast.
  • Tuesday, Three of Cups rx. Don’t expect your friends to necessarily “get you.” That’s too much to ask. Look to feel comfortable in your own skin and the rest doesn’t matter. It’s your job to get you and nobody else’s.
  • Wednesday, King of Cups rx. Emotional impulsivity is a potential issue. If you’re feeling strongly, don’t complete the real world activity without emotionally stabilizing. Powerful emotions that are very short term.
  • Thursday, Five of Wands rx. Pick your battles! I mean, you can pick all of ’em if you want, but it would be unnecessary bickering.
  • Friday, Three of Pentacles rx. Life won’t go as you planned. It’s still okay. Just be flexible.
  • Saturday, Ten of Cups upright. YAY! This is a good time. Hook up with your family–blood or heart family, either way. Surround yourself with loving vibes however you can, even if it’s just the thoughts you are thinking.
  • Sunday, Empress rx. Even inverted, it’s still a good card. Prioritize self-care. Don’t expect everything will just fall into place perfectly today, because maybe not. But progress is good enough.
  • Overview/Advice: Knight of Cups reversed. FEELINGS are very strong and change very quickly. Give yourself a grace period, between feeling strong emotion and taking action this week. Grace periods will save your tail.

Maybe your experience will be different than what I’m expecting–I hope so! But even if it’s not, you can do this. Just give yourself a grace period before taking action to let the feelings enough that clarity can re-emerge. Take any real-world actions once you’re bathed in the energy you would like for the outcome and you’ll do well.

Much love, and stay safe out there.

Dix

p.s. This week’s forecast features the Radiant Rider Waite. Get your Tarot on 1-on-1, or just get my book and flip to a random page to give yourself a DIY bibliomancy reading!

 

Mood Management: Tarot Forecast, Jan 2 – 8, 2017

Sometimes when I’m out and about, people will come up to me to comment on my hair.

Some are complimentary, or they tell me I’m brave. That amuses me a little.

Because I’m not scared of hair color. I’m not scared of looking funny for a little while if something goes weird. But most of all (and what they are usually talking about), I’m not scared of other people disapproving of me.

Happens all the time.

Really, I like when that happens. As we live as true to ourselves as possible, others will disapprove. Which is quite convenient, if you ask me. The ones that don’t vibe with me get pre-sorted out, no fuss. They can be with their people and I, with mine.

Reactions are personal to the reactor, not the recipient. Reactions are never really about what that person is seeing so much as they are about how an individual interprets what they see. There is always a filter of belief coloring reaction.

[bctt tweet=”Beliefs are the filters we forget we are peeking through. #OnMyRadar” via=”no”]

We get to pick, what beliefs to hold. We get to filter the color of our own reactions. That’s a useful little trick, right there.

My sense of the coming week is like subjectivity on steroids. It’s feeling watery as Hell. Whether one likes the sensation or not all that much, it behoves us all to wide whatever waves we’ve got as best we can, no? Plus we can get some fun out of the deal.

Monday, Ace of Cups. There is a bit of a feeling of a fresh start. Reflective mood. Where have I been? Where am I going? Time to consider where you’re at emotionally. Contemplation will come naturally.

Tuesday, Strength rx: Just a little bit of impatience. All those fresh starts of the New Year may just not be as instant as you’d prefer. To deal, focus on one thing, one area of attention, and in that area, take one concrete, tangible act. If you intend to keep a nicer space, don’t feel overwhelmed. Pick up one small area, and fix THAT. The feelings of being overwhelmed and impatient can be sidestepped by allowing yourself more breathing space. It will help.

Wednesday, Nine of Swords upright: Pegging this as worry. Suspicion or paranoia possible. Trust is a bit elusive. If anything is not clear to you today, let it sit and clarify. It will clarify and your perceptions may be murky. No need to jump right on top of ambiguous stimuli. A lot of unrest is internal, so let the fog clear before drawing conclusions.

Thursday, The Magician: The garden grows according to what you plant. The finished building runs according to the foundation you lay. What you have now is an outcropping of what you laid down initially. Realize where you are is according to how you lay down the foundation. Not from a judgey/self-critical space. From a standing-in-your-personal power space. Focus and prioritize feeling good to reclaim your power.

Friday, Page of Pentacles Rx: Easy to drop a detail. Easy to miss a little something or other. Doublecheck and take your time. Go back over plans and give ’em a second readthrough. Be flexible. I’m seeing lateness, little annoyances. Be prepared for minor slowdowns, one thing at a time, easy on the multitasking, things will go smoother. Potential for miscommunication, someone “not getting the message” so be aware.

Saturday, Two of Pentacles rx: Something could easily fall through the cracks. I’m seeing someone oversleeping their alarm, missing a plane, etc. Have backup plans in place, and give yourself space to pick up any dropped stitches because there will be some. Then you’ll be sitting pretty.

Sunday, Four of Pentacles: Some ups and downs throughout the week, but a lot of them are just perceptual. This some rest and ease in stability. Some rest. You can exhale today.

Overview/Advice, Ten of Cups: Have as much fun as you can during the week. Don’t judge on terms of outside conditions. Judge in terms of how you feel, and prioritize your feelings. Many times in the choice between looking for a thought that feels good vs. accurate assessments, we choose accurate because we don’t want to feel foolish. But I’d argue to always assume the best. Even if you know it’s not all warm and fuzzy, it’s okay to remember it has nothing to do with you. Put lots of emphasis on being as happy as you can and it will make motion forward much easier.

Affirmation: I can deliberately reach for joyous thoughts. You don’t have control over many outside conditions. There are lots of things any of us look at and will think, this can be better. We all have the choice, how involved we want to be in other people’s heads, or do we want to just reach for joyous thoughts? Every disaster thus far has worked out. Look at what you feel better thinking.

The quality of the experience is about mood managements. You may not initially think it’s within your control but it is.

How are you with mood management?

This week’s forecast features the Housewives Tarot. The 2017 Zodiac Look-Ahead Special is still on, so if you wanna, get your order in!